Why the Family Courts Must Use the Welfare Checklist — and Stop Wasting Public Money

Deanna Newell
Jun 14
4 min read

Updated: Jun 25

Supporting Children with Additional Needs & Families Affected by Domestic Abuse

Family courts are overwhelmed — and too often failing the very children they’re meant to protect.

Why?

Because too many cases spiral into adversarial adult disputes, driven by power, control, or resentment, not child welfare.

It’s time for a shift. A reset.

The courts must return to their core legal purpose: putting the child’s needs first. That’s exactly what the Welfare Checklist—set out in Section 1(3) of the Children Act 1989—was created to do.

So why isn’t it being used properly?

And why are abusers, manipulators, and time-wasters allowed to drain court resources, harm children’s wellbeing, and waste taxpayer money—without ever being held accountable?

What Is the Welfare Checklist?

The Welfare Checklist is the legal framework that should guide every decision the family courts make about a child’s life. It’s not optional—it’s statutory.

Its purpose?

To make sure the child’s best interests are always the paramount concern—not the rights, grievances, or manipulations of adults.

It applies to decisions about:

Child Arrangements (who the child lives with and spends time with)
Parental Responsibility
Protective or Specific Issue Orders

It’s especially crucial in complex or high-risk situations involving:

Neurodivergent children (e.g. Autism, ADHD, SPD)
Domestic abuse, coercive control, or post-separation trauma
High-conflict parental relationships where safeguarding is at risk

Why It Matters for SEN Families and Abuse Survivors

Families coping with trauma, neurodivergence, or post-separation abuse often face serious obstacles in court, including:

Misunderstandings around neurodivergent communication or trauma responses
Bias or disbelief toward survivors
A lack of safeguarding training among professionals
False allegations of “parental alienation” used to silence or punish protective parents

The Welfare Checklist, when properly applied, gives judges a clear, child-focused structure that ensures no need is overlooked and no form of harm is ignored.

The Welfare Checklist in Action: What It Really Means

1. The Child’s Wishes and Feelings (in light of age and understanding)

Children should be heard—but courts must understand how children communicate.

Especially for neurodivergent children, distress may show through:

Shutdowns, meltdowns, or hypervigilance
Avoidance or resistance to contact
Literal or contradictory statements

Ask the court to appoint a guardian (CAFCASS) or advocate trained in trauma and neurodivergence to help interpret the child’s voice.

2. The Child’s Physical, Emotional, and Educational Needs

This includes:

EHCPs and specialist school support
Sensory regulation tools or mental health therapy
Recovery from trauma, abuse, or disrupted attachment

Example: A child with Autism or SPD may need calm, predictable routines. Forcing chaotic or high-conflict handovers can retraumatise them.

3. The Impact of Changes in Circumstances

Change—however well-intentioned—can cause severe distress for neurodivergent or traumatised children.

This includes:

Switching between homes or carers
Sudden changes in contact or school
Court-imposed routines that ignore a child’s emotional readiness

These children need stability, not forced symmetry between parents.

4. Age, Sex, Background, and Characteristics

This requires courts to look beyond simple age brackets and consider:

Developmental delays or trauma-induced regression
Traits such as rigid thinking, sensory overwhelm, or anxiety
Cultural or family context

A 12-year-old with Autism may need preparation and visual tools to manage transitions—not assumptions about “maturity.”

5. Any Harm Suffered or Risk of Harm

Includes:

Domestic abuse (physical or emotional)
Gaslighting and coercive control
Witnessing abuse, neglect, or fear-based parenting

Children may not verbalise what they’ve experienced—but their behaviour often speaks louder than words.

6. Each Parent’s Capability

This doesn’t mean “perfect parenting.” It means:

Meeting actual needs with consistency and insight
Recognising trauma triggers or sensory issues
Providing emotional safety and structure

Neurodivergent and trauma-affected parents may need adjustments to communicate clearly—but they should not be penalised for being different.

7. The Court’s Powers

The court can issue:

Child Arrangements Orders
Prohibited Steps Orders
Specific Issue Orders

But every order must be:

Proportionate
Evidence-based
Focused exclusively on the child’s welfare—not appeasing adult egos

Financial Alienation, Coercive Control & Economic Abuse

Abuse doesn’t always stop when a relationship ends.

Often, it just evolves—especially in court.

Financial alienation is one of the most damaging, yet under-recognised forms of post-separation coercive control.

It happens when a parent:

Withholds child maintenance deliberately
Manipulates shared finances
Repeatedly drags the other parent into court
Controls access to housing, school fees, or therapy
Uses the legal system to financially and emotionally exhaust the other party

These are not just financial tactics—they are economic abuse, and they directly harm the child’s wellbeing.

Impact on Children:

Missed meals, activities, or therapy due to lack of maintenance
Instability in housing or education
Emotional exhaustion from ongoing legal conflict
Delayed support due to financial gatekeeping

This is child abuse by proxy.

What the Courts Must Do

The court must recognise:

Financial alienation as a form of harm
Strategic litigation as legalised coercion
Evasion of maintenance as neglect

The Welfare Checklist demands this analysis:

Harm already suffered
Risk of future instability or control
Capacity—and willingness—of each parent to meet the child’s actual needs

We need consequences:

Fines or penalties for non-payment
Cost orders for vexatious litigation
Clear prioritisation of child stability over performative parenting

“Parental Alienation” Is Being Misused

While real alienation does exist, it’s too often used to:

Distract from abusive behaviour
Blame protective parents
Force children into unsafe or unwanted contact

Courts must ask:

Has the child shown signs of trauma or fear?
Has the parent previously supported contact, now retracted it for safety?
Is the child avoiding contact for valid, not manipulated, reasons?

A child refusing contact may not be alienated—they may be trying to protect themselves.

Who’s Really Wasting Court Time and Taxpayer Money?

Abusive parents who:

Use court to harass or control
Avoid child maintenance
Obstruct or delay proceedings for revenge

…are not only hurting children—they are draining public resources.

The cost of this legal abuse is paid by:

The taxpayer
The protective parent
And worst of all—the child

Family court reform must include accountability for those who abuse the system itself.

In Summary

The Welfare Checklist is not a tick-box exercise. It is a legal tool to protect children—and uphold justice.

When properly applied, it ensures:

Children’s needs are centred
SEN and trauma are recognised
Abusers are not rewarded for manipulation

When ignored, the result is harm, instability, and an erosion of public trust.

Need Support?

We support families navigating:

Family court and child arrangements
Special Educational Needs (SEN)
Domestic abuse and coercive control
Post-separation recovery and trauma-informed parenting

Together, we can put the child’s welfare back at the centre of the system

Deanna Newell Family Law

Advocacy for truth-tellers, survivors, and the children who deserve better