Stop Asking Who Is Winning. Start Asking What Really Happened.
- Deanna Newell
- Jul 5
- 2 min read
At the start of every family court and Child Maintenance Service application, professionals should complete a mandatory triage assessment.
The purpose is simple: identify risk, identify vulnerability, identify coercive control, and identify the financial reality of the family before allegations become entrenched.
Professionals should ask:-
How long was the relationship?
Were children involved?
Did both parents work during the relationship?
If one parent did not work, why?
Was their ability to work restricted by childcare responsibilities, disability, coercive control, or financial abuse?
Who retained the family home following separation?
Who retained pensions, savings, investments, or other assets?
What financial settlement was reached?
What evidence supports this?
What do the bank statements show?
What do communication records show?
Is there evidence of coercive control?
Is there evidence of financial or economic abuse?
Has contact been restricted and why?
Has financial support been restricted and why?
What were the arrangements before separation?
Who was the primary caregiver during the relationship?
Are there safeguarding concerns?
Is either parent alleging domestic abuse, parental alienation, or post-separation abuse?
What evidence exists to support those concerns?
These questions reveal patterns that allegations alone cannot.
A parent may claim they cannot afford to support their children, yet retain substantial assets from a divorce settlement.
A parent may claim they are being alienated from their children, while evidence shows a history of coercive control, abuse, or inconsistent involvement.
A parent may claim they had no choice but to stop working, while evidence shows years of financial restriction by a controlling partner.
Facts matter.
Evidence matters.
Context matters.
Without understanding the full picture, professionals risk treating symptoms rather than identifying the underlying problem.
Family courts and the Child Maintenance Service should not operate in isolation. Both systems deal with the same families, the same children, and often the same patterns of behaviour.
A structured triage process would allow professionals to identify coercive control, financial abuse, economic abuse, and safeguarding concerns much earlier.
Most importantly, it would shift the focus away from competing narratives and back to where it belongs; The welfare of the children.
Deanna Newell Family Law
Advocacy for truth-tellers, survivors, and the children who deserve better
