Deanna Newell Family Law
Understanding Mental Health: A Hard Truth
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What Is Mental Health?
Mental health is the foundation of how we live, think, and relate to others. It’s not just about the absence of illness — it’s about our overall emotional, psychological, and social wellbeing. Good mental health means coping with life’s stresses, maintaining relationships, and functioning day to day.
Why Has Mental Health Become a Crisis?
Over recent decades, mental health issues have skyrocketed worldwide. The reasons are complex:-
Modern life pressures: Economic uncertainty, social isolation, and fast-paced lifestyles.
Greater awareness: More people recognize and report struggles.
System failures: Mental health services are stretched thin, leaving many without help.
Trauma and adversity: Childhood trauma, abuse, neglect, and adverse experiences contribute heavily.
What Causes Mental Health Challenges?
Mental health problems arise from a mixture of:-
Biological factors: Genetics, brain chemistry, physical health.
Psychological factors: Trauma, abuse, loss, unresolved stress.
Environmental factors: Poverty, discrimination, social isolation.
Situational factors: Relationship breakdowns, unemployment, abuse.
Family Court and Mental Health: A Hidden Crisis
Few people talk about the devastating impact family court proceedings have on mental health — especially where domestic abuse is involved.
The breakdown of a marriage or relationship is traumatic enough, but when abuse enters the picture, the damage deepens:-
Domestic abuse: Physical violence, coercive control, emotional manipulation, sexual abuse, and financial exploitation all take a heavy toll.
Financial abuse: Economic control that traps victims, limits access to resources, and creates chronic stress.
Coercive control: The abuser’s ongoing, insidious attempt to dominate and isolate.
Emotional abuse: Gaslighting, belittling, and undermining self-worth cause long-lasting psychological wounds.
The Dangerous Misuse of “Parental Alienation”
Abusers often weaponize the term parental alienation — falsely accusing victims of turning children against them. This tactic:-
Deflects accountability for abuse and coercion.
Silences victims by framing them as the problem.
Undermines genuine safeguarding concerns.
Puts children at risk by prioritizing abuser narratives over child wellbeing.
Protecting Our Children’s Mental Health in Family Courts and Coercive Situations
Children’s mental health is vital. It shapes how they think, feel, learn, and connect with the world. For children with additional needs or trauma, this foundation is even more fragile — and family court proceedings can deeply affect their wellbeing.
Why Children’s Mental Health Matters in Family Courts
Family court disputes are stressful and often retraumatise children, especially when abuse and coercive control are involved. Children are not pawns to be used in power struggles or legal battles. Their voices must be heard and respected.
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Trauma and abuse leave lasting scars: Physical, emotional, and psychological abuse, including coercive control, damages children’s sense of safety and self-worth.
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Additional needs require tailored understanding: Neurodivergent children (e.g., Autism, ADHD) and those with sensory or emotional challenges need environments that recognise and support their unique mental health needs.
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Children are more than evidence: They are individuals with feelings, fears, and hopes — not objects for adults to manipulate or control.
The Hidden Harm: Post-Separation Abuse Through the Court System
Abusive parents sometimes use the family court system to continue control, disguising abuse as “parental alienation” accusations or “conflict.” This misuse:-
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Silences genuine safeguarding concerns.
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Prioritises abusers’ narratives over children’s safety.
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Inflicts psychological harm on children and protective parents.
The Reality for Children: Mental Health Under Strain
Children caught in these dynamics often suffer:-
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Anxiety, panic, and hypervigilance.
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Depression and emotional withdrawal.
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Post-Traumatic Stress symptoms.
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Confusion, fear, and loss of trust.
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Difficulty coping with change, especially for children with trauma or additional needs.
What Needs to Change
Children’s voices must be central: Courts and professionals must listen to children directly, not just adults.-
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Mental health support must be prioritised: Trauma-informed, specialist support for children and families is critical.
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Coercive control must be recognised: The legal system should identify and respond properly to ongoing abuse disguised as “conflict.”
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Protective parents need backing, not blame: Parents safeguarding their children must be supported, not accused or silenced.
Remember: Children Are Not Toys to Pass Around
Every child deserves safety, respect, and the chance to thrive. Their mental health is not a bargaining chip — it is the foundation of their future.
If you or someone you know is navigating family court and struggling with these issues, remember you are not alone. Help and understanding are possible.